Excess And Deficiency - The Most Powerful Words You Will Ever Use In Creating A Love Filled Life
Excess and deficiency
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight
Throw away every theory. Cast all your knowledge to the wind. Abandon your religion, your intellect and your ego. Fall into truth in just two simple words, excess and deficiency.
Too much and too little. The whole universe is divided into these two. Too much and too little. When there is too much, some is taken. When there is too little, some is returned. This is the ebb and flow of life, the universe, and the way it turns.
When we perceive we have too little, we reach out for it. When we perceive we have too much we push it away. Ahhh, we are forever in the ebb and flow, excess of this, deficiency of that. Too much – too little.
Too much aggression, not enough peace. Too much global warming, not enough environmental awareness. Too much time single, not enough romance. Too much giving not enough getting. Too much work not enough home. Too much greed not enough kindness. Too much hard work not enough play. Too much food not enough exercise. All this adds to a zero sum game because nobody really gets the truth/
For every excess there is always a corresponding deficiency. So, too much aggression has associated with it, too much peace. Too much global warming has associated with it too much global cooling. Too much time single has associated with it too much time spent with others. Etc You don’t have to do a thing.
The person who can’t trust, takes control. They emotionalize. They become reactive because they lost their trust in nature, or God or people. This person wants to fix things because they see excess or deficiency. Too much – too little.
We are gross like this. Not subtle. We are not subtle because we emotionalize. This is the cause of all disease. Excess and deficiency. The body gets too much of one thing and not enough of another. This is all eastern healing summarized. Excess and deficiency – In Tibetan healing – excess wind, excess fire these and others are the cause of ill health. In ayurvedic (India) medicine, excess and deficiency are at the heart of all healing.
If you have long term body pain, it is because one muscle pulled one way and another muscle pulled another for too long. There was an excess strength in one muscle and a deficiency in another. Emotion even goes into muscle tissue and causes bone and joint problems. That’s why yoga balances the body, pushing on pulled muscle, pulling on pushed muscle. Giving the body a balance between excess and deficiency.
In a business if there is a culture change program it is likely to create some values that the company wants. This is called excess because those values, like religious values, push good behavior up, and bad behavior down. Then there is an excess of say “time management” and a deficiency of say “creative innovation”
In nature, where I rest in the arms of love, there is excess and deficiency also. The river would not flow to the sea if there were not an excess of pressure at one end, seeking to balance (the deficiency) at the other. In contrast to what people think, nature never finds balance. No, she is always seeking balance, but if nature found balance, we’d all be dead.
It is the search for balance, moving the excess to balance, moving the deficiency to balance that causes life. Without this there would be no wind, no movement in the ocean to feed the fish, no shaking of the leaves. So, nature never, ever finds balance, simply she is seeking it, over compensating and seeking it again.
In our society, like America for example, we can see trends and fashions and cultural norms going into excess and being balanced by deficiency elsewhere. To the politician it’s a local issue, to the student of the laws of nature, it’s always far bigger than that. My students look and they see that there is a solution to every problem and circumstance, and it is achieved, not by change, but by gaining a bigger perspective. Rising above the emotion.
If America is in excess, eating burgers, coke, drugs, making squllions, and I am not criticizing this, there will be a place, automatically on earth in deficiency. So, maybe Africa. What you can know is nature is always seeking balance. So, you can say the world trade center was not about Moslem terrorism, but more about the balancing of excess and deficiency.
Excess is never measured in quantity. A person with one billion dollars is not in excess unless they are not humble to their gift. We must recognize our own power and be thankful for it, in order not to cause a compensation in our own lives. For example; if a person was given more love than they felt worthy of, then they would be in excess, and someone else would be in deficiency and a compensation would take place.
There is a mathematical formulae which reveals the deeper meaning of this equation of excess and deficiency. It is called the “Golden mean” you can google this and you will discover the most potent insight. They have separated the golden mean, from the golden number and the golden section. This shows you how over specialization leads to extinction. The philosopher, the mathematician and the student of art see their “Golden ratio” as unique. You are a student of the laws of nature. You rise up from this fragmented teaching in an encyclopedia written by neophytes and you “SEE”
If you grow your business faster than the golden mean, this is called excess in nature and it will cause a decline into deficiency later. If you paint a painting, build a building – or do a book cover and the proportions are in deficiency of the golden mean, you will cause the word “ugly” – a repelling force. That is why your hair cut and style can affect your beauty so much. It changes the proportions of your face. There is a sacred geometry that is also, like all the universe, humble to the ratio of the golden mean. (Pythagoras is one of my great teachers. This golden mean is his life study and the way he constructed and understood the entire universe, including sacred music)
Your heart opens with the proportions of the golden mean. Some people automatically understand this and others are always “designing” things. The great artists and designers are actually mathematicians, they use their eye, rather than a calculator, but ratios, symmetries, proportions and the order of perfection are their measure.
More profound is to see a family in a home playing this dynamic. If Dad over works, excess, one child will become lazy. If mum over works, another child will become lazy. Excess causes deficiency. If Dad is in the wrong job, one of the children will become devoted to a cause. If one parent is over attached to the cleanliness of the house, someone will go into deficiency on that topic, and just not care.
One lover wants commitment, the other wants freedom. Then, if the lover who wants freedom suddenly wants commitment, the other partner will want to wait, or delay, to avoid commitment. If you are single and are at a party and are looking for love, lover, loving, you get rejection, refusal (deficiency)
So the worrier in excess causes the peaceful one in deficiency. The aggressive one causes the passive on. Excess and deficiency explains all of life. Every step of it. Nothing escapes. The fool tries to fight to cause an excess to sustain itself, but apart from fashion and social trends which make money marketing temporary brand shifts, we are wiser to rise above excess and hold a greater purpose.
There is no global warming that will not be followed by global cooling. Those people who are fighting a war against global warming are part of that compensation, they are as much a part of nature as those who are causing the warming. No one is an island. We are all part of a huge tide, ebb and flow. The one who lost trust thinks they are causing the tide. The one who has an open heart and can love, can see they are simply a part of something far bigger. This is called inspiration.
When you sit on top of the mountain in Nepal, you see this. You see your little perspective on life back in the city, fixing, compensating, going into excess and going into deficiency. The chemicals of your body change too. Acidity is excess, and alkalinity is deficiency. And like the aggressive entrepreneur (acid) and the born again spiritual peacy peacy one (alkaline) instead of killing yourself with ill health by grasping one or the other, you can grasp both. This is called perspective. A bigger perspective.
A person who can’t get perspective is a part of the problem. A leader who can’t get perspective and see the healthy excess and deficiency in their own company, they will be fighting to make more (excess) or reduce some problem (deficiency) when really there is an existing excess and an existing deficiency, they don’t need to do much at all, except see them both.
In a relationship, I watch people make very bad judgments all the time. They say to their lover “you are in excess” like, you do this too much, or that too much. They also say to their lover “you are in deficiency” you don’t do enough of this, and don’t do enough of that. Now that person in the relationship is part of their relationship problem because they are in compensation with their partner. From this perspective they are both going to fail – meaning fall into mediocrity (which seems like the expectations of most people).
There are two things you might like to observe in your day. The first is that the very thing you want to change in your lover is in fact the compensation for the very thing you like. Say you say to your lover, “you need to loose weight” now this means they are in deficiency of exercise and diet control. But when you are talking to a friend you say “oh my partner is so good to the kids, he comes straight home from work and plays with the children and we put them to bed” There is a deficiency in health control, and an excess in family dynamic. The dumb individual will think they can control the universe. The inspired individual will see that they are, as nature in a dynamic of excess and deficiency.
The second thing you might want to observe with your lover, and people in your life, is that you are a compensation for them. Say you are with your lover and they are overweight because they are not exercising and not eating well at work. You need to look at your part in this dynamic and see if it is you that is in deficiency, balancing their excess. We are so quick to judge our partner for being lazy, when we are work aholic. We are so quick to judge our lovers lack of success when we finally get through our exams.
Stupid people think that they can paint the world with a color that takes away the diversity of it. But if you are truly a student of the laws of nature you will know that the more one person is in excess (say success) the more someone, not always their lover (goes into deficiency). These are the forces of nature.
If you hang out with the same friends for many years you might find, that every time you fall in love, or get successful, one of your friends gets jealous, or goes into deficiency and starts to want to sabotage your achievements. This is most common thing I have ever seen in relationships and business. When a lover holds onto old friends when they enter a new relationship, someone will want to destroy that new relationship, because it makes them feel deficient.
In business too. Friends can become jealous of others who are succeeding, and start to give advice or even deliberately try to drain some of the success into their own pocket to rebalance their perceived deficiency. This is where the laws of nature are so critical in your life. You cannot empower people who are in deficiency around you. This is called many things but the most powerful thing to call it, is bloody sad.
You can work your heart out to build some great love relationship, then, your girlfriend starts to talk about going out late at night, and even if she is married, maybe picking up blokes at the pub. She is actually in deficiency to your new love and her unconscious mission is to bring you down to balance her deficiency.
This is not bad, nor do we need to judge our friend for her perceived deficiency. We just simply cannot empower her, nor, unconsciously follow her suggestions, and end up at war with the most important person in our lives, our lover. If you go into excess your lover can also go into deficiency. If your night life with your girlfriend becomes a threat, and he thinks you are having a great time with her, he may go into deficiency on and around you. Then suddenly you say “why don’t you love me anymore?”
I was in a relationship once and we were so happy. Then my lovers mother, who was single and unemployed made up so many reasons to come into her daughters life. My lover couldn’t see the mother was in deficiency, and was afraid that her daughters excess (relationship) was going to leave her alone in the world (we’re talking 50 plus year old mother here) This is not bad, we can’t judge mum, but to empower, or as I say “buy into” her stuff was not ok. My lover did, and our relationship sunk to the level of the mothers deficiency. This is how, families, friends and people who mean well, sabotage your life.
People don’t get jealous, they just get even. If they see you, in their perception with excess or see themselves with deficiency, they act, subconsciously to equalize the difference. Just like nature does. If someone thinks they got the hard end of life’s stick they act accordingly, and the places they go, to seek compensation are amazing and complex.
This is why we learn to discern. We must accept that people will feel deficient. That is the cycle of life. They are deficient in one area, as you know, because they are in excess in another. They are not out of balance. They might not have the perspective to see that they are in excess in an area, but you can. Then you don’t empower them, and you steer their search for compensation elsewhere. (if you choose)
When you tell someone you love them, at first it is a magic pill for them, mainly because they were deficient (in their perspective) before you said “I love you” then, they are happy, because we are always trying to balance the deficient. But then after a few weeks if you keep saying “I love you” then they go into excess and start to want to be deficient again. They were deficient, and they wanted to be in excess of it, then they were uncomfortable and created a reason, to become deficient again.
To be comfortable with excess in your life you need to be comfortable with putting others into deficiency. If you aren’t comfortable with others deficiency you’ll rescue people and tell them you love them when you don’t or you’ll feed the monkeys bananas and make them dependent. To stay in excess in any one are of your life, you also have to be comfortable with deficiency in some area of your life.
Like hard work means less spare time. Excess work, deficient spare time. Excess love life, deficient work. Excess relationship time, deficient health time. You can’t get balance. Nature never achieves balance. It is more about the honoring of the swings that makes the difference.
Lets say two children are playing and one of the parents thinks their child is deficient, didn’t get a lucky break, or even that the parent fears that the child will get a rough time like they did, then the parent starts to go into excess on the child. They over protect, over provide in excess. They think that over compensating the deficiency of the child is going to cure the child, make them happy where the parent wasn’t but instead they actually breed the very problem they worry about.
Lets think it though. The child is always being provided for, so the child must have deficiency, to balance excess. So, although the parent compensates, the child actually feels just like the parent felt, belittled. Although this is sounding more like mumbo jumbo new age blab blab, it’s really pretty repetitive. Emotions are caused by the sensation of an excess or a deficiency. Reality is caused by stepping back from something and seeing that both excess and deficiency co exist. Emotions cause reactions, reactions are the cause of our unhappiness. Love is the perspective of excess and deficiency, within ourselves, and others. Fashion is reaction. Trend is a fashion.
Don’t be afraid of the perceptions of excess or deficiency. Always step back far enough from any situation so that you can see both. In the office look for the overworker, and the under worker, see the two, know the perfection of balance, don’t react. This is leadership. Know that all disease comes from these perceptions of excess and deficiency and all of our behavior comes from them. Just two words make the whole universe seem so absolutely simple, and predictable.
Too much wine gives you a headache
Not enough, makes you a bore
Too much health makes a happy heart sad
And too much happiness makes emptiness for sure
Too much tenderness turns a child against its sex
Too much violence turns a child to insatiable greed
Too much lovin makes a grown soul weep
And not enough puts all around us to sleep.
Excess means more than what we perceive we are worth
Deficiency means less than what we perceive to be worth
Strange that both can exist in one heart
Live with spirit
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